There are 2 years, 2 months and 18 days between when I was born and my little Sister being born. Growing up it felt a lot closer. We were dressed in identical outfits that and shared a room until we moved house when I was seven. We were often mistaken for twins, which I think pleased our Mum.
We were very close and as we got older although we were two very different people with different tastes and interests we did a lot together - it was expected in our family. I would do anything for my little sister, I even got a paper-round because she was too young to get one and begged me to get it for her! Once we were "grown ups" we worked at two further companies together and loved it. We were still mistaken as Twins, or my favourite I was thought to be the younger sister!
When Daddy and I met, I was amazed at the age gap of 4 years 5 months and 1 day between him and his brother and the further gap of 4 years 3 months and 30 days between his brother and his sister (8 yrs and 9 months between Daddy and his sister). Watching the dynamic between them I could see that whilst they were friends and affectionate to each other they were not as close as my sister and I was still convinced that the 2 years age gap was the right one.
Baby Boy was born 4 years, 4 months, 12 days after Top Ender.
If I am honest I was terribly upset that we were not in a position to have our second child, but I knew that we had to wait. I was worried that the larger age gap would cause trouble for them bonding. Top Ender would not be interested in playing with Baby toys or with a baby.
Now however I'm a convert.
Having Baby Boy has been like having a first child all over again and that is a good thing. I have been able to give him my sole attention whilst Top Ender is at school, I have been able to teach him songs and words and take him for walks and play with him without worrying that Top Ender is feeling left out.
I have an in house help for fetching nappies and socks or shoes, and for making Baby Boy laugh when I can't stop him crying. I have been able to see Baby Boy follow his sister round the garden pausing at flowers like she does and pretending to sniff or water them.
I can't wait until I add another character to the mix... by my calculations I have another three years and about a month until I'm due!
Having seen this age gap in siblings I've taught, I've always thought a larger gap is good. They each get special time with mummy and the elder one helps while the younger has a role model. They've always seemed closer than those 2 years apart who fight and squabble a lot!
ReplyDeleteGlad to have someone else back this theory up! I think a lot of it is obviously down to the parenting and the actual nature of the children but I do feel that the age gap is an important factor!
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